Blogging _ The Intentionality Gurus Podcast
5 October 2021 (Karen Hale)
CONFLICT RULES – “Rules of engagement are important in your relationship to create a sense of safety. When you know that no matter how heated your argument gets, your partner will not throw the meanest words or nearest object at you, you can engage with trust.’ Check out The Good Fight: Use Productive Conflict to Get Your Team and Organization Back on Track[Kindle Edition] By: Liane Davey Sold By: Amazon.com Services LLC
9 September 2021 (Karen Hale)
Conflict Culture was the theme – “the conflict of behavior patterns and values that results when different cultures are incompletely assimilated”
Have you ever experienced this? In fact, as I am posting this I am facing the conflict culture between husband and wife, male and female. Understanding why we react to words and nonverbal language may be the first to resolving conflict.
Check out this podcast at https://youtu.be/KJZCx5S7TeE
22 August 2021 (Karen Hale)
We do not stay the same, we evolve and if we are aware of our surroundings and the circumstances that got us to where we, we may be smart enough to intentionally make changes. If we are unhappy with our lot in life, or the simple situation we may be finding ourselves in, we can learn to guide ourselves down a new path. Today, Candace discussed embracing conflict and just the word conflict can make most of run in the opposite direction. However, what I learned today and what I have been practicing is that facing conflict is a major step to change our attitudes and feel less anxious and or depressed. Without conflict resolution the issue can grow beyond the scope it was intended. Misunderstanding and lack of communication can turn conflict into war. The conversation will provide us with opportunities to overcome our challenges and move in the right direction. (Remember the Fork in the Road.)
Also our current podcast on Youtube https://youtu.be/nPQ7g39ePkQ
25 July 2021 (Karen Hale)
Candace Pollock introduced us to the “Conflict Debt.” We all have a place within us where we store issues of our daily life, convincing ourselves we will take care of them later – but when is later? When these issues begin to overflow they can often be part of a bigger problem as we tip over that storage area and they come tumbling down on us and everyone around us. It is fair to say that sometimes for the betterment of a situation conflicts need to be stored away, if not they may be presented in such a way that a secondary issues is conceived and yet we are filled to brim with no where to store them. When we are debt with our conflicts we may often find ourselves confused and unsure of how they came to be.
I use to be a conflict debt hoarder, or as my husband named it, I was a grudger. I kept all my issues inside until one day when I could not take it anymore I would spit them out not even hearing or knowing what I was spouting out about.
Also check out our current podcast at https://youtu.be/ILfu7NejMPQ
6 July 2021 (Karen Hale)
Candace Pollock has been sharing “Grief” on her bi-weekly podcasts. I believe this topic was meant to be, or at least participating in it opened by eyes and heart to emotions that I have kept bottled up.
Grief has played a major part in my life, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you took the time to reflect you might just say the same. Let me share:
- My Baube, having a stroke, watching my mother get this news received on the only phone we had in the hallway of our two bedroom flat. (Baube dying just a few days after my 9th birthday.)
- Our family dog, RUACH, had to be put too sleep, he got ill quickly and there was no treatment. I remember my brother Gary carrying this big dog (part Pointer and Weimaraner) and placing him in his car, taking him to the VET. (tears and a lump in my throat.)
- Moving to a new school in a neighborhood that was more affluent and feeling like the kid sitting in the bleachers watching the excitement in front of me, not belonging.
- Again, moving numerous times thinking I would find the answers to being included only to feel lost and distant and crying for what I thought I left behind.
- Making choices to make others HAPPY without considering the choices that made me less happy.
- Marriage, Miscarriage, Divorce, Marriage, Misscarriages, Jobs = stress, anxiety and GRIEVING for what I had expected…
- Loss of parents, inlaws, cousins, friends, and the security I thought came with being a U.S. citizen!
Grief is not one size fits all and there is no right way or wrong way to process your feelings. However, there is coaching. “Although the five stages of grief developed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross is considered one of the most easily recognizable models of grief and bereavement, there are other models.” (https://youtu.be/JaBOcjO9sFM)
29 June 2010 This Post was found on Facebook and one I think is worthy of posting here:
- After loving my parents, my siblings, my spouse, my children and my friends, I have now started loving myself.
- I have realized that I am not “Atlas”. The world does not rest on my shoulders.
- I have stopped bargaining with vegetable & fruit vendors. A few pennies more is not going to break me, but it might help the poor fellow save for his daughter’s school fees.
- I leave my waitress a big tip. The extra money might bring a smile to her face. She is toiling much harder for a living than I am.
- I stopped telling the elderly that they’ve already narrated that story many times. The story makes them walk down memory lane & relive their past.
- I have learned not to correct people even when I know they are wrong. The onus of making everyone perfect is not on me. Peace is more precious than perfection.
- I give compliments freely & generously. Compliments are a mood enhancer not only for the recipient, but also for me. And a small tip for the recipient of a compliment, never, NEVER turn it down, just say “Thank You.”
- I have learned not to bother about a crease or a spot on my shirt. Personality speaks louder than appearances.
- I walk away from people who don’t value me. They might not know my worth, but I do.
- I remain cool when someone plays dirty to outrun me in the rat race. I am not a rat & neither am I in any race.
- I am learning not to be embarrassed by my emotions. It’s my emotions that make me human.
- I have learned that it’s better to drop the ego than to break a relationship. My ego will keep me aloof, whereas, with relationships, I will never be alone.
- I have learned to live each day as if it’s the last. After all, it might be the last.
- I am doing what makes me happy. I am responsible for my happiness, and I owe it to myself. Happiness is a choice. You can be happy at any time, just choose to be!
I decided to share this with all my friends. Why do we have to wait to be 60 or 70 or 80, why can’t we practice this at any stage and age?
26 June 2921 – Candace Pollock_The Intentionality Gurus_Completing the Incomplete 6_26_21
23 May 2021 – Grief & Our History of Losses -The Grief Recovery Handbook: The Action book by John W. James – check out the podcast at https://www.youtube.theintentionalitygurus_CandacePollock
22 May 2021 (Karen Hale)
I refuse to grieve for any time lost and appreciate the achievements in my life. For an exceedingly long time, I was more concerned to please and meet the expectations of others. When I say along time, I am talking 50+ years. Even when I went through my divorce, I thought less about myself and more about how I would be perceived. Perception has been a key to the many errors I have made in my journey. The day I woke up and realized all the things I had learned was now my inspiration to change. Change is not easy and often we fall back into the patterns that we have grown accustomed to even when we have chosen to take the fork in the road and travel a new path. New does not mean smooth and seamless, in fact, it can be quite the opposite.
On the podcast, The Intentionality Gurus we are currently discussing grief, and strange as it may seem this has become a theme of many of our podcasts at newclevelandradio.net. (Grief is not just about the loss of life, it can be for any form of loss. There is no right or wrong way to express or display your grief, it is yours to own and only yours. Yes, others may support us and guide us as we travel this slippery slope that one moment is heart-wrenching and the next makes your heart sing and smile with pleasant memories that fill your core. It is ok to have a combination of emotions, in fact, it is natural for all of us to experience a loss with a smile. However, if the smile you are wearing is a mask, hiding your true feelings, that may cause more harm than cure.
The cure for heartache is working through it and finding the sunshine that comes up in the East and sets in the West. Your smile may not appear at dawn but at sundown, you may feel calm or at high noon you may find yourself giggling over something you cannot identify. When those feels of happiness emerge capture them in your soul and keep them close.
I cannot remember a time when I did not feel sadness. I looked at life from the outside looking in, even when I was intertwined with those I wanted to be more like. I grew up dislike many things about me that I thought wasn’t like those I wanted to be more like. It ranged from not liking my body (thin, chunky, or FAT!) It was not always body image, I never felt I was as smart as others and often found myself over-compensating and in my head not measuring up.
It is never too late to change and it’s OK not to be perfect. I do not expect everyone to like me or agree with me, but I will go out of my way to ensure others will not hate me and open dialogue will add strength and purification to my journey. I am a giver and when I give on my watch it has much more meaning.
Join us on newclevelandradio.net and enjoy positivity.
9 May 2021 Sunday is Mother’s Day and Candace Pollock and I will be recording one of her bi-weekly podcasts. The subject this week is, “Lessons from the Grief Recovery Method: Myths About Grief” This is the second time this week newclevelandradio.net will be discussing the subject of grief. On Tuesday, May 4, Elise Marie Collins https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKbFhahgmkE&t=363s welcomed Michelle Marlahan, a yoga teacher, writer, and Creative Grief Advocate.
Grief is a subject that we tend to pack away and ignore and when we experience it we often fail to experience it with our eyes wide open. On Sunday, May 9, 2021 at 4 pm EDT if you click on this link you can participate in The Intentionality Gurus – https://us04web.zoom.us/j/9802469876?pwd=dWR1aFZicHo4VjQ1WjE0NDFaYnJCQT09
24 April 2021 https://youtu.be/TVEUrrdsWZw
Today we began a new series on the Grief Recovery Method. Take a moment and ask yourself what grief means and how it affects you.
Grief is a noun meaning deep sorrow, especially that caused by someone’s death.
Informally it means, trouble or annoyance.
On behalf of Candace Pollock, I want to encourage you to listen to these podcasts and to get involved in the dialogue. When we prepare ourselves for the glitches in our life we are to do something or make the adjustments needed.
17 April 2021 https://podcasts.apple.com/TheIntentionalityGurus
It is important to find your voice. Do not be silenced, however, when voicing your opinions, wants, and or needs you may want to consider thinking before you speak. We all have choices to make in life and too often we use words and tones that incite and anger others. The emotions and tones you use whether in conversation or writing, letters, emails, tweets, and texts, it is important that what you are expressing comes across correctly.
Learning to be an Intentionality Guru means you are willing to feel from within and share that message in a non-threatening matter. Bi-weekly, Candace Pollock guides us through her podcasts which we share with you on her Facebook page as well as this website. When we are intentional we can stop before we speak and do, we can look at the fork in the road and pause as we decide how our body language, as well as the chosen words, will be heard.
The response that is provoked by the message may not be your intent and the reaction you receive may be destructive. What is your intention and how can you invoke an acceptable response?
10 April 2021 https://youtu.be/UyI_asKFDbM Are You Willing? We may say we want to change, but are we willing to make the changes we want? We may not want to participate in an event, but will we make an excuse or go, dreading our choice? Are we the victim of fear of change? If you answered yes to any one of these questions welcome to the club of life. Many of us want to make changes in our lives whether it is to losing weight, exercise, eating healthier, socialize more, socialize less, change careers, or any number of things. However it all comes down to one simple question – Are You Willing?
29 March 2021 https://youtu.be/dyKTw3b3ai0 Flexibility is the key to success. Although I have lived most of my life following the rules, some of the rules I enforced upon myself were not healthy and caused me bouts of anxiety as well as a sense of being too busy. Wanting to please others I added more, and more to my calendar each day and despite not having enough hours in the day I found the snippets I need to complete each task and yet never feel the exhilaration of crossing the finish line. Just I complete yesterday I got a foothold on today… On The Intentionality Gurus (3/29/21) Candace Pollock walked ‘us’ through the 12th commitment of enough. When committing to enough and you are above the line or open to the concept, “I commit to experiencing that I have enough of everything… including time, money, love, energy, space, resources, etc.” However, if you find yourself below the line, closed off, allowing the anxiety to overwhelm you, “I commit to a scarcity mentality choosing to see that there is “not enough” for me and others in the world and therefore I have to be conscious of making sure I get and preserve what is “mine.| Life is not perfect no matter how much we plan and set expectations, life can be messy and we can feel as if we have enough one moment followed by feeling as if time is passing us by… I will not profess that I live my life above the line, consciously being open, aware, and accepting my success but through personal coaching, I am finding my inner happiness and when I find myself in a spiral going down below the line I reach for a life jacket – all you have to do is reach out for guidance.
24 March 2021 Although Saturday, March 27th would be the scheduled date of The Intentionality Gurus, please note due to various reasons, we will be recording and posting on Monday, March 29th. Life is filled with changes, some large and some very minute. Our recording’s day and time were intentional for this next episode in the scheme of things changing. To be intentional means to choose to make an important decision. ” Being intentional means getting clear upfront about what you want to achieve…” Watch for our next podcast, and if you would like to join in the conversation logon using this link at 5 pm EST https://us04web.zoom.us/j/9802469876?pwd=dWR1aFZicHo4VjQ1WjE0NDFaYnJCQT09
14 March 2021 https://youtu.be/o2R3kCCzN2E Candace Pollock_The Intentionality Gurus _ Source of Approval, Control, and Security 2_27_21 Over the last several months’ Candace Pollock, Life Coach/Podcaster, has been leading the conversation using “The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership.” “The 15 Commitments of Conscious Leadership is a relationship roadmap that covers the full spectrum of ways that we can live and relate from either fear/below the line or trust/above the line.” These concepts were created by Diana Chapman, Jim Dethmer, and Kaley Klemp based on The Hendricks Institute’s work.” https://conscious.is/concepts/the-15-commitments-of-conscious-leadership Join us by listening to the previous podcasts, and if you would like to participate in future recordings, please contact us at email@example.com. In the subject line, please type THEINTENTIONALITYGURUS
13 March 2021 https://youtu.be/TiLQ9ELb1O4 Today’s podcast theme is “Win-lose vs. Win-for-All.” However, we all want to win; how important is winning, and is there a methodology for a WIN-FOR-ALL Scenario? Before you listen to today’s podcast, ask yourself the question – can we both agree? According to Stephen Covey, “Win/Win is a belief in the third alternative. It’s not your way or my way; it’s a better way, a higher way.” What if you chose to collaborate rather than compromise or only choose one solution that may not work for both sides of the equation. This process begins with dialogue and open-mindedness to work together to create a solution that does not assess a loser. Compromise = “an agreement or a settlement of a dispute that is reached by each side making concessions.” Collaboration = coordination of efforts to work with another person or group to achieve or do something. View Page
March 18, 2018 – just about 3 years ago to the date today (Friday, March 12, 2021), Candace Pollock joined newclevelandradio.net with her podcast series, The Intentionality Gurus. Each bi-weekly recording has taught me (Karen Hale), producer and internet manager, that personal coaching is such a positive venue. This series has taught me how to feel my thoughts and determine if and when change is needed. Like you, change is not easy for me; even when things in our life (personal or business)are producing negative thoughts and feelings, we cling to them because even discomfort can be comfortable. I hope you will join the journey and reach out to Candace Pollock at newclevelandradio.net – you two can participate in not of her podcasts or choose to schedule one-on-one personal/business coaching sessions.Using the scale above – check into your feelings – Coaching is not Therapy – it is a choice to make better choices.